Re-birthing

I was introduced to the idea this week.  I had heard of being  “born again” but I never gave it much thought, it was just a label to me.

Re-birthing as it was explained to me is what happens after a major life event.  It is what you make of yourself, your life and your surrounding once you make it thought the other side of the event.  The event can be just about anything that rocks your world;  from a job lost to income lost to lost love to having nothing grow in your garden.  It is something that is important to you and not the world on a whole.  It is that moment when most of the emotion has slowed down, when you take a look at your life and decide the next step in your path.  You may choose to keep going on the same path or you may decide to jump off and go another way.  Like being born, re-birthing can be painful but it is also wonderful if you let it.

Not sure where I am going here.  I found the whole idea of “being given permission” to take a new path peaceful.  Realizing that it is up to me and only me to decide where to go now.  I still remember my mom telling me when my marriage ended that it was going to be one of the most fun times in my life.  My answer was something to the effect are you nuts?  She tried to explain to me that I could do anything that I wanted, only I was holding myself back now.  If I wanted to use my out door patio furniture in my dining room, then there was no one to say that I couldn’t.  If I wanted to eat cookies all day (not a good idea) but I could do that too.  I am not sure she realized what she was talking about had the label of “re-birthing”.  It wasn’t until I started to type this that I remembered her telling me it was ok for me to do what ever I wanted to do.

I have no clue what I really want to do going forward.  Some days it is one thing, other days it is something else.  I allow myself to get overwhelmed by the physical things that in part of my brain I think I should do or have based on that faceless “they”.

I am sure it will take a lot more time to figure out what is next but hopefully for the moment I will remember that it is ok to just take it moment by moment, task by task, one step at a time.

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